Back on the insane celebrity gossip end of my spectrum, I turn to the recent story about David Beckham, soccer star's newest tatoo. Yes, I'm plunging to the depths of the bowels of the writing cesspool. Here is a link to the Marie Claire article, should you wish to find further information http://www.marieclaire.co.uk/news/celebrity/176828/david-beckham-gets-new-posh-tattoo.html
This was forwarded to me in an email (sorry, I don't know the source):
While David Beckham allegedly strayed from his marriage in the past, women looking for a hook up in the future will find the indelible proof of his marital status inked on his muscular left forearm – a six-inch tattoo of his wife, Victoria.
“They are both thrilled with the result,” said a source quoted by Hello magazine. “It has been beautifully done. Victoria is flattered."
The 11th addition to Becks’ growing gallery of body art, this latest design depicts his “Posh” wife as a bare-breasted angel, surrounded by stars. The new image wraps around an older inscription of Victoria’s name written in Hindi.
“He thinks she’s his angel,” said another insider, “which is why he got an image of her among the stars.” But it isn’t all about Posh. Friends say Becks is well on the way to emulating the lead character on his favorite show, “Prison Break,” whose upper torso is completely covered in tattoos.
OF COURSE, now it's becoming evident, Becks is a gangsta' wanna' be, but he's a soccer stud until such time. Insert my eye-roll here.
A message to the Main Squeeze (and anyone else who cares) THIS IS NOT ROMANTIC to this Dish. AT ALL. DO NOT CONSIDER FOR VALENTINE'S DAY GIFT. It is just gross and a waste of money. Can you imagine what this will look like when he turns 85, for example, and the wrinkles skew the "art"?! There are other ways to state that you are married and to BACK THE @#$^ off. Billboards? wedding rings? I just am not certain that a potential chick looking for squeezing with Posh's husband is going to be able to FIND the wife's tatoo in and amongst all the other stuff going on that "canvass".
Showing posts with label gossip. Show all posts
Showing posts with label gossip. Show all posts
Friday, February 1, 2008
Saturday, September 29, 2007
Sir Charles and The Main Dish
Photo from last night's UAB Minority Health Foundation Fundraiser. Sir Charles is quite a gentleman. He thanked the service staff and stood patiently so everyone could have their photo taken with him or get an autograph.
His buddy, Shaq, Shaq's mama, and Mrs. Barkley were in attendance. Shaq was a guest of honor. Don't you just love these good boys who take their mamas as their dates? It's pay-off few mamas get for attending every single game -- it's important, Poodle, even if your child isn't future NBA material. And, you can see that it will be a long (ha!) shot for my boys to get in the NBA with such a shrimpy mom (I was wearing 3-1/2" heels and obviously subconsciously stretching my neck upwards, how funny is that?). Baseball, football, and soccer haven't been ruled out, yet.
Wednesday, September 5, 2007
Amy Winehouse Crack
Continuing with the today's apparent theme of Topics Qualifying for Southern Gothic Novel Story Lines Yet To Be Written, I submit the following link concerning Amy Winehouse, one of my Mental Bubble Gum obsessions (ref. Edge of Coolness post) who routinely makes me feel amazed by my capacity as a Responsible Competent Adult (my absolute fave term found in numerous kiddie toy assembly instructions).
UK fallen stars 2:35
The jaw-dropping moments of this CNN report for This Dish include Amy's father's soundbite and the reporter relaying that Amy's in-laws are pleading with people to stop buying her records, which, by my Mental Giant calculations, are enabling her drug habit. Oops! Did I spoil the best part for you????
UK fallen stars 2:35
The jaw-dropping moments of this CNN report for This Dish include Amy's father's soundbite and the reporter relaying that Amy's in-laws are pleading with people to stop buying her records, which, by my Mental Giant calculations, are enabling her drug habit. Oops! Did I spoil the best part for you????
Murmur, Murmur
Sources very close to me reveal that there will be another Beth Holloway Twitty (a.k.a Natalee's mom) John Ramsey (a.k.a. Jon Benet Ramsey's dad) sighting this weekend at a gala in Birmingham. They have been seen together at Art on the Rocks (a popular soiree at the Birmingham Museum of Art) and around The Tiny Kingdom in multiple locations in close proximity to each other's personal space. (Catch up, Sunshine! Fox news, The Denver Post and other sources have been reporting this since June.)
An arrow from Tabloid Cupid's quiver? Unlikely. Try this: they are both Southerners who lived through a Southern Gothic type situation who handled themselves with grace, were articulate (unlike my Personal Temporary Obsession #3, Miss South Carolina, also, a Southerner, I believe - let me go check my The Map such as), and anyone whose heart isn't made of steel cried about both of their daughters.
You know, finding someone decent to date is hard enough, but I can only imagine the "well, you just don't understand" kind of moment that's inevitable when the dreaded, awkward moment when the "unusual circumstances around the deceased's/s' situation" comes up OR when reporters continually call the house. Not many available guys I've met in the Dating Realm are remotely capable of "going there".
Perhaps someone will be attending this posh gala and can report back? Surprised it won't be me? Sorry to disappoint, Poodle. I've already made a commitment to go to the Belk Invitational Preview Party at the same time (Semiformal attire). It's the first time as a JLB member I've been invited to a party that I didn't have to drop a load of wonga in order to attend. The interesting social butterfly question that hits me is what does one wear to a semiformal party hosted by a department store? I'm intrigued.
An arrow from Tabloid Cupid's quiver? Unlikely. Try this: they are both Southerners who lived through a Southern Gothic type situation who handled themselves with grace, were articulate (unlike my Personal Temporary Obsession #3, Miss South Carolina, also, a Southerner, I believe - let me go check my The Map such as), and anyone whose heart isn't made of steel cried about both of their daughters.
You know, finding someone decent to date is hard enough, but I can only imagine the "well, you just don't understand" kind of moment that's inevitable when the dreaded, awkward moment when the "unusual circumstances around the deceased's/s' situation" comes up OR when reporters continually call the house. Not many available guys I've met in the Dating Realm are remotely capable of "going there".
Perhaps someone will be attending this posh gala and can report back? Surprised it won't be me? Sorry to disappoint, Poodle. I've already made a commitment to go to the Belk Invitational Preview Party at the same time (Semiformal attire). It's the first time as a JLB member I've been invited to a party that I didn't have to drop a load of wonga in order to attend. The interesting social butterfly question that hits me is what does one wear to a semiformal party hosted by a department store? I'm intrigued.
Friday, August 31, 2007
The Edge of Coolness
Waiting in carpool pick up line the other day, it hit me: Am I in danger of losing my edge? When did eye cream start regularly appearing on my grocery list? I didn’t feel compelled to check how much I had left a few years ago before jetting off to the store. Eye cream today, support hose tomorrow. Shriek!
Highlights of the Main Dish's action plan to actively keep the edge alive and kicking:
1. Update the vocab. This is important to retaining the edge if for no other reason than if you have kids, you truly need to understand what they’re saying – it could become a safety issue. This suggestion sports a warning label: Know how to use the new and improved vocab correctly or your cover will be blown to bits. I highly recommend regularly checking http://slang.otheday.com/ who’s mission in life is to keep me sleeping with the boss (TRANSLATION: on top of my game). Get your mind out of the gutter; I don’t have a boss!
2. Keep current on current topics. This is pretty easy to do once you figure out what entertains you. If you want to know more about politics, by all means, read several newspapers and magazines dedicated to that field. This diva doesn’t like all that arguing (Mental Bubble Gum Chewer that I am), so I keep up with Brittany Spears, Amy Winehouse, and the lovely Miss Teen South Carolina. They really put my life into perspective like nothing else. Compared to them, I’m not only really together and a competent adult, I’m a MENTAL GIANT. This is especially rewarding after a day of demands from kids and coworkers wanting outrageous results ranging from producing supper that they’ll actually eat to turning in reports in a timely fashion.
2 (a) Personal Temporary Obsession #3 Lauren Caitlin Upton (a.k.a Miss Teen South Carolina). For sport, I’m embracing a temporary quest to end a majority of sentences in “such as”. What better way to keep people listening to you when you have nothing further to say much less the inability to talk suscintly and make sense simultaneously?! This is Verbal Bubble Gum and I simply must try it. I’m seriously considering writing a post using this format such as. Lemme know what you think, m’K.
3. Seek adventure. Start small: Try a different restaurant, a new ethnic food, call a friend you haven't seen in years and go to lunch. None of these takes much time or planning, so get off your JLo-inspired butt and go have some fun. Now, if you really want to spice up your life, get out. Travel. Intimidated? Go to a state or national park – I highly recommend the Caribbean National Forest in Puerto Rico, the only rainforest in the US Park system.
When does a diva have time to work on her edge? Carpool line! How else are you going to fill up those 21 minutes of your day?
It’s not so much that a diva loses her cool edge, she just may not realize it slips away bit by bit. The work, school, soccer schedules organize our lives, but the danger to our edges comes when we slip into becoming schedule drones. Fight it. Kick your game up a notch, Pumpkin. Embrace your inner fabulousness. Reclaim your cool edge such as.
Highlights of the Main Dish's action plan to actively keep the edge alive and kicking:
1. Update the vocab. This is important to retaining the edge if for no other reason than if you have kids, you truly need to understand what they’re saying – it could become a safety issue. This suggestion sports a warning label: Know how to use the new and improved vocab correctly or your cover will be blown to bits. I highly recommend regularly checking http://slang.otheday.com/ who’s mission in life is to keep me sleeping with the boss (TRANSLATION: on top of my game). Get your mind out of the gutter; I don’t have a boss!
2. Keep current on current topics. This is pretty easy to do once you figure out what entertains you. If you want to know more about politics, by all means, read several newspapers and magazines dedicated to that field. This diva doesn’t like all that arguing (Mental Bubble Gum Chewer that I am), so I keep up with Brittany Spears, Amy Winehouse, and the lovely Miss Teen South Carolina. They really put my life into perspective like nothing else. Compared to them, I’m not only really together and a competent adult, I’m a MENTAL GIANT. This is especially rewarding after a day of demands from kids and coworkers wanting outrageous results ranging from producing supper that they’ll actually eat to turning in reports in a timely fashion.
2 (a) Personal Temporary Obsession #3 Lauren Caitlin Upton (a.k.a Miss Teen South Carolina). For sport, I’m embracing a temporary quest to end a majority of sentences in “such as”. What better way to keep people listening to you when you have nothing further to say much less the inability to talk suscintly and make sense simultaneously?! This is Verbal Bubble Gum and I simply must try it. I’m seriously considering writing a post using this format such as. Lemme know what you think, m’K.
3. Seek adventure. Start small: Try a different restaurant, a new ethnic food, call a friend you haven't seen in years and go to lunch. None of these takes much time or planning, so get off your JLo-inspired butt and go have some fun. Now, if you really want to spice up your life, get out. Travel. Intimidated? Go to a state or national park – I highly recommend the Caribbean National Forest in Puerto Rico, the only rainforest in the US Park system.
When does a diva have time to work on her edge? Carpool line! How else are you going to fill up those 21 minutes of your day?
It’s not so much that a diva loses her cool edge, she just may not realize it slips away bit by bit. The work, school, soccer schedules organize our lives, but the danger to our edges comes when we slip into becoming schedule drones. Fight it. Kick your game up a notch, Pumpkin. Embrace your inner fabulousness. Reclaim your cool edge such as.
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